ぼくはマラッカ海峡を抜けて南下したが、アンダマン諸島とボルネオ南西部の間の僅かな距離の移動のあいだに、船を三度もぶつけてしまい、その時には、こんな予測不能な大変動の中を生き延びた人間の作ったものなら、そんなことなど全く問題にはならないという気がして、かなりの悪態をつきはしたものの、海の藻屑と消えてしまうかどうかは成り行きにまかせた。その三度の事故のもたらした効果として、悪の衝動が再び解き放たれた。ぼくは言った。「ぼくは彼らの奴隷にされている。死などに手に負える相手じゃないんだ」それから数週間は、これといった村を見ることも、森に覆われた日陰の土地も見ることもなく、むき出しの土地は荒れ果てていたから、船を停泊させることはなかった。オーストラリアの北部に広がるこれらのスパイシー・アイランズ（香料諸島）のほとんどには、一年の大半をかけて、ぼくの足跡を残すことになりそうだった。次第にあちらこちらへとジグザクに船を進ませるようになってきていて、それはほんの思いつきの方向、あるいは海図の上の指針の動きにまかせていたからだ。ぼくはここの緑に覆われた常夏のどこか魅惑的な隠れ家の中で、苦痛を和らげ、休息を与えてくれるロートス（訳注：食べると家や故郷のことを忘れ、夢見心地になるという果実）を食べることを考えたりもしたが、そこの小屋の入り口から阿片の真珠のような煙の向こうに見えるものは、古い環礁の中に囚われた穏やかな礁湖で、椰子の木はうたた寝するかのように垂れ下がり、そしてパンの木が甘く飽いた夢の中で音を立て、そしてぼくは青白い環礁の礁湖の中に停泊しているスペランザ号を見つめ続けて、何年もの月日が経った後に、ぼんやりと、あれは何だろう、どこからやってきて、なぜあんなにしっかりと永遠に繋ぎ泊められているのだろうとぼんやりと考えるようになって、そうしたメランコリーの平和と重荷の至上の喜びの年月の果てに、太陽と月が回転することを止めていることに気づき、のろのろと身体を起こし、やがて重い瞼を開いて、夢とうつつの間をたゆたっていると、神が「もう十分だ」と頷きながら合図を送って寄越し、そしてその『存在』は気絶するように眠りの中へと落ちてゆくのではないかという気がした。ならば、北京で生存しているらしい中国人の老人も、一人の異様な狂人にすぎないのだと、ぼくは気を失ってしまいそうなほどの笑いの発作に襲われた。
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I passed down the Straits of Malacca, and in that short distance between the Andaman Islands, and the S.W. corner of Borneo I was thrice so mauled, that at times it seemed quite out of the question that anything built by man could escape such unfettered cataclysms, and I resigned myself, but with bitter reproaches, to perish darkly. The effect of the third upon me, when it was over, was the unloosening afresh of all my evil passion: for I said: 'Since they mean to slay me, death shall find me rebellious'; and for weeks I could not sight some specially happy village, or umbrageous spread of woodland, that I did not stop the ship, and land the materials for their destruction; so that nearly all those spicy lands about the north of Australia will bear the traces of my hand for many a year: for more and more my voyage became dawdling and zigzaged, as the merest whim directed it, or the movement of the pointer on the chart; and I thought of eating the lotus of surcease and nepenthe in some enchanted nook of this bowering summer, where from my hut-door I could see through the pearl-hues of opium the sea-lagoon slaver lazily upon the old coral atol, and the cocoanut-tree would droop like slumber, and the bread-fruit tree would moan in sweet and weary dream, and I should watch the Speranza lie anchored in the pale atol-lake, year after year, and wonder what she was, and whence, and why she dozed so deep for ever, and after an age of melancholy peace and burdened bliss, I should note that sun and moon had ceased revolving, and hung inert, opening anon a heavy lid to doze and drowse again, and God would sigh 'Enough,' and nod, and Being would swoon to sleep: for that any old Chinaman should be alive in Pekin was a thing so fantastically maniac, as to draw from me at times sudden fits of wild red laughter that left me faint.
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I passed down the Straits of Malacca, and in that short distance between the Andaman Islands, and the S.W. corner of Borneo I was thrice so mauled, that at times it seemed quite out of the question that anything built by man could escape such unfettered cataclysms, and I resigned myself, but with bitter reproaches, to perish darkly. The effect of the third upon me, when it was over, was the unloosening afresh of all my evil passion: for I said: 'Since they mean to slay me, death shall find me rebellious'; and for weeks I could not sight some specially happy village, or umbrageous spread of woodland, that I did not stop the ship, and land the materials for their destruction; so that nearly all those spicy lands about the north of Australia will bear the traces of my hand for many a year: for more and more my voyage became dawdling and zigzaged, as the merest whim directed it, or the movement of the pointer on the chart; and I thought of eating the lotus of surcease and nepenthe in some enchanted nook of this bowering summer, where from my hut-door I could see through the pearl-hues of opium the sea-lagoon slaver lazily upon the old coral atol, and the cocoanut-tree would droop like slumber, and the bread-fruit tree would moan in sweet and weary dream, and I should watch the Speranza lie anchored in the pale atol-lake, year after year, and wonder what she was, and whence, and why she dozed so deep for ever, and after an age of melancholy peace and burdened bliss, I should note that sun and moon had ceased revolving, and hung inert, opening anon a heavy lid to doze and drowse again, and God would sigh 'Enough,' and nod, and Being would swoon to sleep: for that any old Chinaman should be alive in Pekin was a thing so fantastically maniac, as to draw from me at times sudden fits of wild red laughter that left me faint.
"The Purple Cloud"
Written by M.P. Shiel
(M.P. シール)
Translated by shigeyuki
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