I was sick, but I did not expect to heal.
I wanted to get back to the condition before I got sick, but I read it in something like "I'm not going back to the original thing to recover from my illness, it is to stand on a completely different horizon" .
If it did not get sick ... Perhaps this time it would have been like this ... I thought I had to get back the time I lost because I was sick, but I noticed that it was not so.
If I had not experienced that dark bottom, I began to think that I was not standing in the place I was. To recover from illness was not to return before sickness, but to stand on a completely different horizon, to see a completely different landscape.
Illness was a long hopeless tunnel for gestalt transformation, so to speak.
I think that walking through it has transformed my various aspects.
Humans do not collapse to a certain extent, there is a point where you can not be aware.
I feel that the fear of being broken is less than before. Because it always reproduces even if it breaks. And that regeneration is never the way it will be.
Google translation 😄