Every 16 hours a woman is shot and killed by a current or former partner

shame noun (BAD FEELING)

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C1 [ U ] an uncomfortable feeling of guilt or of being ashamed because of your own or someone else's bad behaviour:
He said he felt no shame for what he had done.
The children hung/bowed their heads in shame.
The shame of the scandal was so great that he shot himself a few weeks later.
You can't go out dressed like that - have you no shame (= don't you feel ashamed about being dressed like that)?
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[ U ] loss of honour and respect:
He thinks there's great shame in being out of work and unable to provide for his family.
In some societies, if a woman leaves her husband, it brings shame on her and her family.

shame (shām)
n.
1.
a. A painful emotion caused by the belief that one is, or is perceived by others to be, inferior or unworthy of affection or respect because of one's actions, thoughts, circumstances, or experiences: felt shame for having dropped out of school.
b. Respect for propriety or morality: Have you no shame?
2.
a. A condition of disgrace or dishonor; ignominy: an act that brought shame on the whole family.
b. A regrettable or unfortunate situation: "It was a shame how the place had fallen apart, with tall scorched grass and sagging gutters" (Tom Drury).
c. One that brings dishonor, disgrace, or condemnation: "I would ... Forget the shames that you have stained me with" (Shakespeare).

Definition of shame

1 a :a painful emotion caused by consciousness of guilt, shortcoming, or impropriety
b :the susceptibility to such emotion have you no shame?
2 :a condition of humiliating disgrace or disrepute :ignominy the shame of being arrested
3 a :something that brings censure or reproach; also :something to be regretted :pity it's a shame you can't go
b :a cause of feeling shame

How Shame Becomes a Lethal Weapon for Mass Killers
Why men kill is a challenging question.
By Sheana Ochoa / AlterNet November 15, 2017, 2:44 PM GMT

I wish I could say Devin Kelley is an anomaly, but neither his violence at home nor the mass murder he committed is rare. Every 16 hours a woman is shot and killed by a current or former partner. Meanwhile, on average, there is nearly one mass shooting a day in the United States. These events are not anomalies; they happen every day.


Over the past decade, the FBI has been studying what makes people commit mass murder. The agency came up with such theories as the copycat effect (exacerbated by social media), violent video games and mental illness. What wasn't addressed was the growing research indicating exactly how violence is rooted in the traditional male identity, where male shaming turns into rage. This is not to say women are not violent; only that 98 percent of the time, mass shooters are male.

The traditional markers of masculinity require men to be virile and dominant over women. By holding on to such definitions of self, the male identity is prone to crumble when a man is rejected by the opposite sex. This is why sexual assault is about power, not sex. This is also why up to 75 percent of domestic femicide occurs when the woman is trying to leave her abuser. In order to preserve their sense of control and power, the men in these cases would rather kill a woman than allow her to leave.



Psychologist James Gilligan spent 35 years studying incarcerated murderers. He discovered that the common motivation these men had for committing murder was to preserve their traditional masculine roles. Gilligan identified how these men had felt disempowered and used murder to assert their sense of control. Some of the murderers said they killed for honor or recognition, or to settle a grievance, but it invariably boiled down to the need to “eliminate the feeling of shame... and replace it with its opposite, the feeling of pride.” Gilligan explains that shame caused violence in these men because at the root of shame is a desire to be loved and validated, but seeking love or care from others flies in the face of their socialized roles—their need to be self-reliant as opposed to being passive and dependent.

Brown defines shame as the “intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.

　１６時間に１人の割合で女は、現在のパートナー、あるいは、元彼に殺されている。その７５％は女性が男性を見切りをつけて去ろうとしたときである、と。

　自分の解釈をまじえて、言うと、強くなければ、男ではない、男は支配的であるべき、という固定観念があり、その男性が女性に拒絶されると、傷つく。しかし、傷つくことは、弱さの象徴であり、表に出すわけにはいかない。むしろ、力を誇示することによって、弱さを隠さなくてはいけないし、暴力をふるうことによって自分が上だということを示さなくてはいけない、と間違っておもう男どもがいる、といったところか？


　戦争の動機として、利益、恐怖、名誉が挙げられることがありますけど、名誉を傷つける、恥をかかせる、ってかなり大きなことなんだね。