What are you?

July 7, 2006 /

Sometimes, it raises its head again and starts to harrow me.

I heard one of my coworkers has been in bad shape lately.
She has stiff shoulders and is cold-natured. Apparently she has poor blood-circulation. I think what she should do first is to take some exercise not only to press acupressure points.
Yesterday, I happened to ask her what was so bad. She said that her stiff parts has widened beyond her shoulders and now her entire back is stiff and tired. It makes her feel slightly nauseous. The reason it got worse she thinks was because of a long ride by car. She took a trip recently and she said that is because.
I jokingly said to her like, ' What kind of old lady are you? You should start exercising right now!! Heh, heh!'
She laughed back at me and said ' Yeah, I know. I should go to a swimming pool and walk otherwise I would waste the new bathing suit I bought weeks ago!'

Somehow I cannot stop worrying if she secretly got hurt by my words since then. When I was in depression, I got hurt very easily. I don't say she has ademonia but you know, when you are in bad shape, your heart likely to become ill too. It feels like she has similar character as me, who tries to make smile all the time. No matter if she is happy or sad. I starts to obsess with this idea that she was smiling but in her she was hurt.

I think I am just imagining. I hope so.

I am so obsessive when it comes to conversations with people. I thought I got better but seemingly not yet perfectly recovered.