How to know if he's Really a Good Guy
from http://www.ehow.com/how_4836311_hes-really-good-guy.html
Step1 AFFECTIONATE
Some people have to be at a certain place, time or mood to express their feelings. A Good Guy's heart jumps when he sees you and has to show you affection regardless of who's around and what's happening. He's not pushy or clingy with his affection either.
Step2 COMMUNICATION
He loves to share with you how his day was and how much he missed you. He tells you the truth and when he makes a mistake, he admits and fixes it. This builds a solid trust between you both and each one feels safe to be themselves and talk freely.
Step3 R.E.S.P.E.C.T
You are his queen and even in a heated argument he knows the line to never cross. He lets you express yourself and listens. Even if he disagrees, he doesn't demean you or make you feel like you're foolish or inadequate.
Step4 GIVING
No matter how he feels, his focus is on you. For example, he could be tired from working but sees that you're busy with the kids or your own work. He goes ahead and fixes you a tasty meal with your favorite glass of wine.
Step5 HUMOROUS
He always knows how to get your mind off of worrying about something with a tickle or a funny joke. You know what he's doing, but can't resist and get over what had initially upset you.
Step6 HUMBLE
He never dominates and makes it about himself. He always makes you feel empowered to be the best that you can be.
Step7 KEEPS IT REAL
You might have a lot of pride but you're no dummy. Avoid letting it kick in and always be open to correction from your Good Guy. Other people may know you, but he really knows you! Being corrected or "having your flaws pointed out" can be hard to hear, but rewarding to your personal growth and relationship later on.
Step8 YOU'RE WORTHY
He knows why he fell for you and why any other man would want to take his place if he screws it up. You know how you should be treated and won't negotiate on anything less.
Step9 AIMS TO PLEASE
Girlfriend, what did you do this man? He wants to run back to you as often as possible. If he can't see you, he's always in contact via email, text, Morse code or TV! He is sure to make up for lost time with a sweet surprise, a night out at a great restaurant or a short trip out of town.
Step10 AFFIRMATION
He shows you how much he loves you in more than words but his actions. It is evident that he's fully aware of the gem he has and will do whatever it takes to keep her happy.
Step11 HE MAKES YOU BETTER
He doesn't try to change you, but make you better. Do you remember how immature you used to be? Now some of your closest friends and family still can't get over the change. You only wanted a 9 - 5 job, but he was the one to push you to start that new career, new business, and told you to not be afraid to strut your stuff. He makes you feel like a natural woman!
Step12 FORGIVES AND LETS IT GO
Some people forget that everyone makes mistakes. You make one mistake or don't do what they want and all bets are off. Not in your relationship. You both are a work in progress and understand there will be bumps in the road and forgive each other.
Step13 ROOM TO IMPROVE
He knows what areas need improvement and is committed to doing so. He welcomes your feedback and is sensitive to what you say and how you feel.
Love is not perfect and neither will you or your partner be, but you sure can come awfully close. Enjoy exploring love with in yourself and continue to work on bringing out the best in each other!
Fireplace myths busted
from http://green.yahoo.com/blog/greenpicks/267/fireplace-myths-busted.html
<概要>
冬に暖炉で暖まり、小さい薪が燃える香りは誰にでもその季節を思い起こさせます。。´∀｀*
でも実際薪暖炉は家を暖めているのでしょうか?火を起こして倹約できてるのでしょうか?てわけでまた一本薪をくべる前に実情を知っておきましょう。
環境保護団体の調査によると約2700万件のアメリカ人の家庭で石造(れんが)暖炉の所有がみられ、この伝統的な暖炉が屋内を暖めるのに一番非効果的な手段であるとわかりました。
従来の薪暖炉の熱効率はたったの7%で、ほとんどの熱は煙突から出て行ってしまっています。ある調査で、毎回薪に100ドル消費してもその内10ドル～20ドル程度の熱量しか得られていないことが判明しました。あなたがいる場所が暖まるだけで、部屋が暖まっているのではないのです。
また薪を燃やすことで屋内外両方で空気汚染が発生します。その薪のにおい自体も人体に有害で、わずかな煙の漏れがあることからも暖炉がきちんと役目を果たしてないことになります。
それ以上の問題が、冬にたくさんの人が薪を燃やすことで、これが特に盆地や都市部でスモッグ現象を生み出してしまいます。これを踏まえ都市部では薪を燃やすことに対しての限度を設け、より汚染を抑える暖房装置の推奨をしているのです。
もし暖炉にしようと検討中なら、EPA(環境保護団体)のアドバイスを参考に...
・よく乾燥した薪だけ燃やす
・生ごみやダンボールは燃やさない
・薪を燃やす装置の扉は閉めたまま
・煙警報機の設置、維持
・一酸化炭素探知装置の設置、維持
Everybody loves a roaring fire in the winter -- the picture is immortalized on holiday cards, and the smell of wood smoke evokes the season for many people.
But can a wood-burning fireplace really heat the house? Will you save money by stoking the flames? What about that smoke filling the air? Get the facts before you pile on another log.
Fire is humankind's oldest form of heat, but that doesn't mean it's the most efficient or cleanest. According to an Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) study, about 27 million American homes feature conventional masonry fireplaces. But this study (PDF) found that these traditional fireplaces are the least effective means to heat a room.
A conventional open radiant fireplace has a thermal efficiency of a mere 7%. Most of the heat escapes straight up the chimney. Another estimate found that for every $100 you spend on firewood, you get only $10 to $20 worth of heat. The traditional fireplace only warms your heart, not the room.
In addition, burning wood creates air pollution, both inside the house and out. That woodsy smell is actually a health hazard, and even a slight leakage of smoke into the room is a sign that the fireplace isn't working properly.
A bigger problem is when many people burn wood in winter -- this creates winter smog conditions especially in valleys and urban areas. Cities and states across the U.S. are trying to limit wood burning and encourage less-polluting heating appliances.
For example, the San Francisco Bay Area, Vermont, and Alaska have programs to warn residents about wood-smoke pollution. This kind of particulate pollution is especially dangerous to the elderly, children, and people with asthma and other lung conditions.
It is possible to heat a home with wood fires, but not the old-fashioned way. Modern, EPA-certified woodstoves and pellet stoves can be very efficient and affordable heaters. Also, gas fireplace inserts burn cleaner than conventional fireplaces.
If you upgrade to a woodstove, make sure to follow the EPA's advice:
- Burn only dry, well-seasoned wood.
- Never burn household garbage or cardboard.
- Keep the doors of the wood-burning appliance closed.
- Install and maintain a smoke alarm.
- Install and maintain a carbon monoxide detector.
And get more burning tips before you try to heat with wood.
'Best Job' winner stung by dangerous jellyfish
from http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091230/ap_on_re_as/as_australia_world_s_best_job
<概要>
オーストラリアでの"世界で一番いい仕事"の募集に選ばれたイギリス人のベンさんが猛毒を持つイルカンジクラゲに刺されて致命的な状態に陥ったらしい。幸運にも彼は今回無事に命を取りとめた。
マッチ棒よりもずっと小さいクラゲがもつ毒が引き起こす症状が、熱・頭痛・腰痛・胸部の張り・高血圧・落ち着きをなくす等といったもので、中には一週間以上続く症状もある。
ベンさんはジェットスキーを楽しんだ後ハチくらいの小さい刺し傷を見つけて後に手足がピリピリし始め病院に搬送されたという。
2002年にオーストラリア北東で2人の旅行客が小さい生物によって命を落としたが、あとになって原因がイルカンジクラゲと判明した。
.......don't forget to wear a full stinger suit when you swim in the ocean!!
ADELAIDE, Australia – Trouble struck paradise this week when a British man who has the "Best Job in the World" as the caretaker of a tropical Australian island was stung by a potentially lethal jellyfish.
Ben Southall — who won a contest to blog for six months about life on Australia's Hamilton Island to promote tourism — wrote Tuesday that he was lucky to have survived his brush with the extremely venomous Irukandji jellyfish.
Earlier this week, Southall was getting off a Jet Ski in the ocean when he felt "a small bee-like sting" on his arm. When he later noticed a tingling in his hands and feet, island staff took Southall immediately to the doctor.
Progressive symptoms of fever, headache, lower back pain, chest tightness and high blood pressure led the doctor to diagnose that Southall had been stung by an Irukandji jellyfish. He was given pain medication and slept off the venom's effects overnight.
"I thought I'd done particularly well at avoiding any contact with any of the dangerous critters that consider this part of the world their home," Southall wrote. "This was not what I'd wanted at all and had caught me little off guard to say the least — I'm supposed to be relaxing in my last few days on Hamilton Island."
Australia is well-known for its myriad deadly creatures, but the peanut-sized Irukandji remains rather mysterious. It is virtually impossible to see and is tiny enough to pass through nets meant to keep jellyfish away from popular swimming spots.
Its sting can lead to symptoms including shooting pains in the muscles and chest, vomiting, restlessness and anxiety. Some symptoms can last for more than a week, and the syndrome can occasionally lead to a rapid rise in blood pressure and heart failure.
In 2002, two tourists were killed in separate incidents after being stung by the tiny creatures off northeast Australia — the first recorded Irukandji fatalities.
"My slight knock was enough to tell me that it's not something to be messed around with," Southall wrote of the jellyfish. "I really should have been wearing a full stinger suit, as it recommended at all beaches here at this time of year."
He said he was feeling well and was enjoying his last week on the job.
The 34-year-old former charity worker bested nearly 35,000 applicants from around the world for the dream assignment that started in July to swim, explore and relax on Hamilton Island in the Great Barrier Reef while writing a blog to promote the area and earning a salary of 150,000 Australian dollars ($120,000).
How to tell if your partner is ready for marriage
フィアンセが結婚の準備ができてるか見分けるには?
Perhaps the only person who really knows if your partner is ready for marriage or not is your partner. However, there are some signs which may signal that he or she is positively heading in the direction that you seek.
One thing that you should know, as you contemplate whether or not your partner is at the stage where they could happily marry you, is that you can't ever push them into being ready. We all reach this point in our own good time, and sometimes this doesn't always match our partners own marital time clock perfectly.
As a marriage is a partnership both parties involved need to show willing, and be able, to work well together. If your partner already takes on responsibilities, is reliable and caring, without having to be asked then this is a good sign that they may be ready for full on commitment.
They should also be faithful to you without you having to ever consider that they have a roving eye. If your partner doesn't seem entirely loyal to your now then marriage will not make them any more committed.
Generally speaking, people who are ready for marriage are not over fearful of being so. It is normal to be a little nervous of getting married, as well as being excited, but if your partner often says derogatory things about marriage or makes jokes about commitment then they are not ready.
Another point to consider is whether your partner clings to bachelor ways. This goes for female partners as well as male ones. It is healthy for both people in the relationship to want and get some 'me' time. However, if the me time stretches into relationship time and you end up always towing the line then your partner still has some bachelor time to go through before they are ready for you.
If your partner lets you completely into their life and is honest with you then this is an excellent sign if you want to get married. If they shut you out from important issues that effect them then your communication will be unlikely to withstand the test of time.
They don't have to tell you absolutely everything about their past, unless you both see this as necessary, but you should know about anything which may effect your relationship together. They should also fill you in on any practical issues from their past which are relevant to your future lives together.
To sum things up, if your partner communicates freely with you, acts in a caring manner, behaves responsibly and honestly, remaining completely faithful and loyal, then it may be time to go shopping for rings.
What He Means When He Wants a "Break"
面白い&参考になる。彼氏が彼女との間に"一時的な休息"を置く裏事情がわかります :)
My friend's boyfriend recently told her they needed "to take a break." He said it would help him figure out if they were meant for one another. My question is: don't you figure that out by spending time with each other?
Doing your own thing within a relationship is healthy separation, but taking time apart to figure things out is not good. If you love someone, you enjoy being around them and you would never think of being apart. If you need a "break" to "figure out" your feelings, chances are your feelings are not that strong.
There's a difference between "breaking up," and "a break". "A break" indicates the relationship is off temporarily with the possibility of getting back together. "Breaking up," is a definite ending with no indication that you will ever get back together again. Therefore, a "break" is more unfair than breaking up" because it's less clear.
From a guy's perspective, a "break" usually hints at something bad. And, most of the time, a guy sugar-coats his reasons for a "break", saying it's ultimately for the best, or will help him figure things out. No relationship is perfect, and a break may help in some situations, but whenever there are questions/doubt about feelings it can't be good.
Because it's so vague, it's tough to know what a "break" really means. Here are a few possibilities:
Incremental Breakup
Some guys are too chicken to break up in one shot. So, they do it in pieces. He might want you to take the hint when he doesn't call and disappears during a break. Even if you get through the break and date again, he may have attained his goal by planting a seed hinting at a breakup down the line.
There's Someone Else
Many of my friends describe their horrible behavior while they were "on a break" from their serious relationships. The easiest way to keep your boyfriend or girlfriend, while giving in to that meaningless temptation, is get it out of your system while on a break. And if there is not someone specific, the person who asks for a break may want the freedom to hook up with other people.
Wait For Me While I Play
If someone does not specifically say they are "breaking up with you," then you still have hope, don't you? And they may leave this opening on purpose because they want to return to you after they do whatever they have to do during this break.
My friend continues to say "this is just a break and we will end up together." So, she's pretty much waiting for her boyfriend to get through the break period and return to her, after he "confirms" that he loves her. But she doesn't know what he's up to, and maybe he's never coming back at all. Hoping for his return prevents her from moving on, so he can come back whenever he wants to.
Let's See Other People
"Figuring out if you're meant for one another" might simply mean they want to date other people to see if there's someone better out there than you.
The "break" is an unfair because it's a middle ground: not broken up, but not together. The person who asks for a "break" is in total control: they are doing whatever they need to do, and you're left wondering what you're supposed to do, especially if your goal is to stay together. They don't have to pick up your calls, or see you. And they are pretty sure you'll wait around for them.
I don't condone waiting around for someone after they've asked for a break. The best thing to do is move on. Even if they still like you, they won't take you for granted if they realize they could lose you. So, instead of wondering and trying to predict, you should make the best use of this "break" time for yourself.
What are your thoughts on the differences between "taking a break," and "breaking up"? Do you agree that a "break" is vague, and usually means something bad, and a break is not necessary to figure out if you like someone? Has a "break" ever worked out for you and your significant other? Do women mean the same thing when they ask for a "break"?