申し訳ありません

私は誇りに感じるだろうたびに家の外に。

father a lingering illness of which

2017-06-23 11:58:26 | 日記


A passer-by was regarding them curiously and so she sat, for Gallatin’s look compelled her. She did not understand what he meant, and in her heart she knew she could not care whose faith he kept, or why, but she recognized in his voice the note of a deep emotion, and was conscious of its echo in her own spirit. Outwardly she was as disdainful as before, and her silence, while it gave him consent, was anything but encouraging. As he sat down beside her the puppy, “Chicot,” put his head upon Gallatin’s knees and looked up into his eyes, so Gallatin put his hand on the dog’s head and kept it there.

“I want you to know something about my people—about—the Gallatins——”

“I know enough, I think.”

“No—you’re mistaken. We are not all that you think we are. Let me go on,” calmly. “The Gallatins have always stood for truth of speech and honesty of purpose, and whatever their failings they have all been called honorable men. Upon the Bench, at the Bar, in the Executive chair, no word has ever been breathed against their professional integrity or their civic pride . My great grandfather was a Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States, my grandfather a Governor of the State of New York, my father——”

[90]

Miss Loring made a gesture of protest.

“Wait,” he insisted. “My father was a great lawyer—one of the greatest this City and State have ever known—and yet all of these men, mental giants of their day and generation—had—had a weakness—the same weakness—the weakness that I have. To one of them it meant the loss of the only woman he had ever loved—his wife and his children; to another the sacrifice of his highest political ambition; to my  he subsequently died. That is my pedigree—of great honor—and greater shame. History has dealt kindly because their faults were those of their blood and race, for which they themselves were not accountable. This may seem strange to you because you have only learned to judge men by their performances. The phenomenon of heredity is new to you. People are taught to see the physical resemblances of the members of a family to its ancestors—but of the spiritual resemblance one knows nothing—unless—” his voice sunk until it was scarcely audible, “unless the spiritual resemblance is so strong that even Time itself cannot efface it dermes hk.”

The girl did not speak. Her head was bowed but her chin was still set firmly, and her eyes, though they looked afar, were stern and unyielding.

“When I went to the woods, I was—was recovering—from an illness. I went up there at the doctor’s orders. I had to go, and I—I got better after a while. Then you came, and I learned that there was something else in life besides what I had found in it. I had never known——”

“I can’t see why I should listen to this, Mr. Gallatin.”

“Because what happened after that, you were a part of.”

“I?”

“It was you who showed me how to be well. That’s[91] all,” he finished quietly. He rubbed the dog’s ears between his fingers and got some comfort from Chicot’s sympathy, but went on in a constrained voice. “I was hoping you might understand, that you might give me charity—if only the charity you once gave to the carcass of a dead deer.”

There was a long silence during which he watched her downcast profile, but when at last she lifted her head, he knew that she was still unyielding flu virus.


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